Broadstairs - 22nd Oct 2008

'Arty' Broadstairs

Clothes

I bought a dress for the Xmas party.

Today I took it back.

So looks like I am gonna have to make do with this skirt... and some other items I guess...

Does repeating a theme bother anyone?!

Beautiful early walk

Now its grey again :(

MSN Messenger

For those to whom I chat to via MSN - well I am finally all squared with my works profile so no more MSN at work I'm afraid. Feel free to email instead - or keep posting comments here! If you're really lucky you may catch forever Gills online in the evening...

Only one question - PC Anon - are you still up for Barnet? Or has the realisation of the sort of footballing experience that really is hit home yet?! Not Old Trafford I'm afraid...and I'm not sure the half time tucker will be half as nice as it was at Exeter..! Let me know. Otherwise keep smiling all you MSN chums.

Well done to Burnley this evening btw. The Arse got a hiding! LOL...

Has my

blog gone squiffy? 'About me' seems to keep disappearing down sarf...maybe it symbolic! Sparky rings me more now he is in Oz than he did when we were in the same county!! Bless.

I went swimming last night - 40 lengths. Got home and thought the eyesight in my left eye was impaired for life. It's ok now but was quite scary. I also wore my swimming cap.. mmm nice!

Watched 'Spooks' - my word that was a) gruesome b) edge of seat stuff. Thankfully Lucas survived.

Still not caught up with 'Survivors' so may need to watch iPlayer rapidly this evening!!

While I am here the tube journey in this morning was horrific!! Defective tube into Stockwell - leaning on doors - stops moving. I got quite nervy and could feel my heart racing. The feeling of being trapped. Would the train behind stop? Was there commuter anarchy going on in the rear carriage were the problem was? We drew slowly in to the station and then were all turfed off. The platform was rammed.And people still want to push passed you. grr. Suffice to say when I eventually got above ground I took some very deep gulps of air..

And now its raining. Lovely.

Delightful December once more!!

Your December Forecast:

There's plenty of passion and poetry in your life now, but perhaps not in a sweetly romantic sense. A drama in your personal life has a sharp, unresolved edge. Sparks fly when you spend time with a certain someone yet you're not happy about where they fly and what they set light to. It's not just the story of your heart that can't unfold properly till something settles. Your ability to generate wealth and solve problems elsewhere is being compromised by a tense situation. Something needs to be soothed, settled and sorted out. And before the holidays are over, this will all have happened.

Wishes Granted

A beautiful new day dawns for you, karen, so send a big thank you to the Universe. On Monday, lovely Venus conjuncts Jupiter in Capricorn in your sector of self, and you will be glowing with good vibes. Your sense of positive optimism will rise high, and if you make a wish, it might just be granted. Make sure that you remember the old saying, "Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it," because you are due to have a request given to you very soon. It's a great time for you to mend fences with anyone with whom you are currently on the outs, so consider picking up the phone and reminding your best friend that everyone has disagreements from time to time and that all is forgiven, at least on your side! On Saturday, you are back to sorting through all your responsibilities and duties as Mercury squares Saturn, your ruling planet. You may need to ask for help in cleaning up and organizing your dwelling space from your roommates or family members. Of course, if you live alone, you will be the one saddled with buckets and sponges unless you can afford a cleaning service!

Your Week Ahead: There's only one issue on your mind, only one question you seek an answer to. I am tempted to say, think less about all of this. But that's easy for me to say. I am not living your life. I am not subjected to the same amount of stress and aggravation. Still, though, I can see that you're too caught up in a drama to recognise. You sorely need a sense of perspective. Talk to a friend who's not so involved. Canvas the opinion of a disinterested third party. Jupiter, as it passes through your sign, suggests that despite your strong urge to tackle trouble head on and personally sort everything and everyone out, you need to stand further back, not dive in deeper.

This pic pleased me

Purr

FA Cup Magic..

Yesterday we played really well against Stockport.. especially the first half. The second half less so, but we didn't concede. The 4,412 of us that turned out saw a top effort by the team, in the mist, murk and rain... and this afternoon after watching Leeds being turfed out by Histon the 3rd round draw took place... oh brilliant - second to last out - we're at home (if we win replay) to Aston Villa - please please please... the 3rd round is played on the w/e of my birthday so I have such strong wishes!! Please win the replay Gills! If it wasn't a Tuesday pm in a week when I have to be at work I'd go! La la la!

All in all Saturday was a strange day - I awoke in a daze. A cosy daze. I have to keep smiling to myself. And as the weather was so very uninspiring I stayed put. Ah. Warm duvet and inward smiles. Eventually up and dressed and off to the game, my love. FAC second round - its been a few years since we got this far! The train was quiet, Victoria station quiet - well all the top London clubs were playing Sunday. It was wet and cold so a treat - a large skinny wet latte. Slurp. Heyho. The Actor was texting en route to Manchester - Stockport being his home team. Zig-a-lig and I texted apres the game. His beloved NCFC losing once again. Why do we do it?! And midway through second half a call from Oz. It was too loud I couldn't hear a word so I rang back after the game. Not good. Distance sharpens the focus. Dare I say it but Madge sums it up in her dittie - Miles Away... mm.

Next week .. erm, Monday is swimming, I have invite out for a beer Tuesday, which I should probably turn down. Thursday I am due to meet an old school chum who moved to Canada but is back for the week and Friday is the works Xmas party. And yes kids I have bought a dress for said occasion... so better get walking and eating less!!

Have a good week all...and please may I see some blue sky and winter sun this week please?! Thanks!

Come on u Gills!

What a pleasant afternoon!

Refreshing

What a change an hour or so with new people makes .. actually having discussions and being made to think on your feet without the responsibility of anyone else except yourself. No weight of expectation. No competitive nonsense. Actually knowing you are being listened too. Reminding yourself of the journey you have made and the qualities you do have to offer. And laughing.

Mm.

So remind me again why am I still in the same spot? Is it because I am too loyal. Stuck in my ways. Scared?

How long am I going to be this foolish for? Grr.

Anyway. Watch 'Lead Balloon'. It's good.

Mm

Cosy bedtime

Wednesday

Pluto moves into my sign... and erm. Nothing has changed!

Well a very early start left home at 7.35 am (just what I needed after my chilly pitch side experience) and I finally got out of the building they call work at gone 6.30pm. No wonder I yawned through my last meeting... And all hopes of a day off to go to the RAH for tennis are fading.. soz Mazza. xx

Right bed... ah snuggle into my duvet with my doggy hot water bottle mmm. BLISS! A hug would be just as nice too of course. Oh well.

Thank M & S

For thermals. 1 all. Boo

Bugger

Its cold! Thermals on-mm sexy huh!

Karoona Star'fish'

Not quite 5 legs (or whatever they are!) but 44 lengths of the pool. Which was shade cooler than I was hoping for!! Hey ho. It was warmer than the office today - which had zilch heating and my feet were like blocks of ice...

In other news... I am not a celebrity but if I was I would be yelling to get me out of that camp.. what a vile slice of life.

The new coco pops

Advert uses a great tune by Terence Trent D'Arby... 'Sign Your Name (Across my Heart)' - haven't listened to that album for AGES... so quality reminder!

Yoh Planetface - let's drool!

Fast forward to 1.59 min!! :-)

Dynamic Change

This is an important week for you, as Pluto will be moving into your sign on Wednesday. It will stay in Capricorn until 2024, and in the process, it will transform your approach to life and living. You will also begin express yourself more powerfully and dynamically. You will need to be sensitive to those to whom you're close. There may be a tendency to think that your word is law. It would help your relationships, especially the more intimate ones, if you put yourself in the other person's shoes from time to time. There is a major focus on your spiritual and karmic zone, which seems very positive and uplifting. Mars is helping to stir things up by encouraging you to explore your beliefs, especially those that tend to lie just beneath the surface of your awareness. You will notice these because they trigger events in your day-to-day life and continue to do so until you sort out the problem at the source. These issues may become more frequent. You may meet people that you feel you have known from another life. A New Moon in your spiritual zone on Thursday makes this an excellent time to start a spiritual practice, such as meditation, yoga, or tai chi.

------

This week you may be restricted in what you can achieve. At times you may not be clear why you feel frustrated. But you need to listen to the subtle cues and pick up on the undercurrents in the surrounding atmosphere. Regard this as a planning and preparation phase. Your sensitivity to the needs of others will make you a good listener. And you may find yourself counselling and caring for others, more than usual at the moment.

Your Week Ahead: You are good at what you do. But is this because you never let yourself do what you aren't any good at? Or not while anyone is looking, at any rate. You are not proud, but you do take pride in your ability to do a job well. Right now, though, you are beginning to wonder whether you have bitten off more than you can chew. You feel exposed, vulnerable, conscious of the possibility that you could make a dreadful mistake at any moment. That's great. As long as you remain aware of that danger, you won't put a foot wrong. Venus is in your sign. Love, wealth, popularity and creativity are all on offer to you.
Week Ahead Part Two: 'Mirror mirror, on the wall... who's the fairest Capricorn of all?' This is not, really, a likely question. It's hard to imagine anyone born under your sign requesting a reply, especially from an inanimate object made of glass. But, then, these are exceptional times we are living through. Just ask the International Monetary Fund. If banks, those bastions of stability can need the kiss of life... if heroes like Obama can get into the White house... why can't Capricorns suddenly turn a little vain? It won't last long. It doesn't need to. Right now, you are the fairest. Venus is in your sign. Numerous admirers insist you're the top of their list. Act with the dignity that you'd expect a pin-up to show!

Virginia 5.3

My new hair colour.

Discovery of the weekend? Lopping off 4ins from my denim skirt makes it short obviously - and much more wearable ... even when its a bit a chilly! ooh ahh.

And this morning between 10.30 and 11.45 was perhaps the most optimistic time to go out - I came home soaked. BUT Primark in Tooting was quiet and I could make purchase with ease! Hey ho.

Anyone else gonna watch Survivors after Top Gear?! mmm.

Have a good week all.

Oh dear...

I appear to be watching the X-Factor results show... do I stick or twist?! MOTD!?

Good to see the Gills return to form away from home ..NOT!!

It never looks

Like this when i make it :)

Lush colours

Mmm a tasty drop!

My leaf

A year on

Happy 3rd Birthday!

Yes today 'Assume Nothing' is 3YO...

So that's 3 years of dirge I have been serving up for possibly no one else's pleasure except my own!

And they said it wouldn't last!! (Previous B-d posts; 1YO and 2YO) Not sure either reveal too much? I can reveal I am still very much in touch with the Actor who suggested I start blogging, though he himself has stopped blogging for personal reasons. I spotted a friend had made the odd post or two recently which cheered me. Otherwise - I am still on a roller coaster! The divided personality lives!

To celebrate I have taken a day off and after a lazy morning of getting up when my body wanted too and not when the alarm said - I have been for my walk, sorted my wardrobe (de-clutter or excuse to purchase more shoes/clothes? not yet sure) AND made the double trip to put said sorted clothes into recycling bins. Which means I have reclaimed my bath!! Amazing! SO now in preparation of a wander round the shops later this afternoon I am gonna have a nice soak. Oh yeah and some breakfast.. oats anyone?

My PhotoAlbum

At last I have managed to connect camera to PC! Hooray!

The transfer was quick now I am fighting broadband to get said decent pix onto my new online photoalbum...!! Check it out...

Oh MO

The Marx Sisters.... (not sure what is worse... the tash or the triple smily chin?!)

Best have a think about it...
Yes a birthday party where moustaches were the theme of the evening...like I need a stick-on one?!

Teynham

was mentioned on Five Live this morning.. as part of the traffic report. Fame huh!

Unbelieve-able -

Strictly goes mad!! And the judges don't like that 'what the public do' - so the honourable man has to walk....tsk.

Hormones..

why oh why do they over shadow all rational thought and make everything seem like the end of the safe world...

Suffice to say I have managed to pull myself over the hump of despair that trapped me at the end of last week. Maybe having my Pop safely back in the country helped.

Maybe knowing that Sparky got home in time and can now spend some proper time with his Mum has heartened me. It does mean of course he is job hunting and I have no idea if and when he will return. I am just glad he has the opportunity to be where he is needed as opposed to hiding from his responsibilities through 1,000s miles of distance...

Maybe its the decision to take Friday as leave and treat myself to 3 days of me-time. I have a wardrobe of clothes that need sorting out again. I have a lost ring to look for, after Mum realised it was no longer on her finger after last week. I have plenty to occupy me, and I have a long overdue lay in to relish.

I just need to rest my brain. I can't change the situations. I can though stop clamming up and actually articulate how I feel and for once learn to deal with the consequences of being honest as opposed to censoring what I say having already walked through the reactions and decided it's not going to be helpful. I hate it when people tell me how I will react or behave, so I should apply the same to myself. We are each entitled to make our own choice based on what we know. I do know my head is all over the place. Distracted would sum it up.

A friend commented I did not want to be loved.

I suspect there is an element of truth in it... I don't feel able to accept myself as deserving of it. I dis-trust its meaning based on previous experiences, I long for security and have trained myself to only trust myself. Look where it has got me...And yet when said by certain people it feels true. I want to embrace it. I want to wear a stupid grin and be airy. Cat with the cream. Ah well.

A discussion with a former colleague revealed last night that my life has not budged for the last 18 months whereas his has. He seemed more alert and enthused than I recall. It was good to catch up and lay things to rest. It was good to be out with the team. Even on a Tuesday. But unnerving to realise that my life has not altered that much at all. Promotion. Swimming. Mm. I must not dwell on the things I cannot change. But I can think seriously about a long holiday somewhere warm and interesting....

Ah yes btw - Gills v Stockport FAC2 - ta Pop for getting my ticket!!

Mind Evolution

You feel much better about yourself and your life than you have recently, karen, and in fact, the optimism you feel inside yourself shows on your face and is apparent in the way you interact with others. Lovely Venus is currently in Capricorn and your sector of self, and you are presenting a very appealing persona to the world in general. On Thursday, the Moon in health-conscious Virgo trines Venus, and you decide to make your feeling of well-being a permanent part of your life. You'll investigate ways to pump up your biorhythm and make sure that you exercise and eat properly. Be certain that you are getting enough sunlight and that you have green plants around you in your living space. On Friday, you may change the way you think as Jupiter in Capricorn trines Saturn in your philosophy sector. You have been known to be a bit rigid and inflexible in your thinking patterns, and now you will be ready and willing to evolve your mindset in a very expansive way. You will open yourself up to a lot of new and original viewpoints, and part of that process will be your exploration of spiritual and religious organizations and programs.

Casualty

Watching it now on iPlayer... Karen... lives in a flat with her parents. As well as catching mice they are all suffering sleep deprivation form their noisy upper neighbour....mmm so familiar... ah and now a leak from above. My script.. they used it!!!

Darn it...

Run out of time - and I had so much to share too....

Hey ho. Here's a whistle stop summary.

The Gills won. (Score flatters to deceive and the home crowd want a constant fight with the stewards). Andy Hamilton was average. (He should stay as 'Old Harry' in my mind - far too much recycled material)
Both events made me wonder what audience I should really sit in as I felt as if I did not belong in either.

My new musical purchases have kept me occupied.(Sasha - Invol2ver & Oakenfold's Greatest Hits & Remixes) As has a rather rejuvenating wander through my C-D collection. Ah. I love Placebo. As I have grown up so have they - and boy do their songs reflect a moment in time... 'Lady of the Flowers', 'Ask for Answers', 'Brick Shithouse', 'Infra-red' etc etc...

Have decided the antidote to 'feeling' alone is to keep 'doing' stuff - to think about real problems/issues. Rather than the what ifs. (Ah but not work related ones. Work is something I very much trying to blot out. I keep dreaming of periphery soon to be central people and it gives me an uneasy sense).

Thursday and Friday were odd days, but I cannot be selfish and absorbed by own 'feelings', for once those that Sparky are about to experience are far more important and I have to be strong and as there for him, as anyone who is half way round the world can be...I have shed many a tear over the last 8 days. An article in the Observer had me in tears on the tube. Texts from my bro. Items on TV. Goodbyes. Must go's. No regrets. Lingering kisses and holding on so tight to make it last longer. The lurch in the stomach as words are said. No regrets.

Warm up

Convincing!?

Call Night

A very proud moment ..

Dining @ Middle Temple.

I did that once upon a time very long ago

Shell shocked

And I am too far away to be of use.



Why is life so rotten?

It's lunchtime..

that's the only reason I am here.

I have been so busy or tired that the last thing I have wanted to do is boot up my PC at home and write - and yet in being so apathetic I have lost the moments of so many things over the last well month I guess... I have footie games I need to report on. My trip to Exeter remains a chapter unwritten. My new camera - I did get round to installing software but still not moved photos off of the thing!

On Monday I felt abandoned. Well Friday afternoon actually. My Pops is in the US chasing aircraft and sunlight. My Sparky friend departed Kent as soon as they piloted the gas tanks to Edinburgh and Ireland. My friend at work bid farewell to begin maternity leave. I got quite emotional. I had taken on the responsibility of getting a leaving gift. It bought home to me the true wonder of bringing a new being into the world. The complete expression of love. And if anyone deserves all the happiness - it is Cam. Our friendship has matured and now we are as close as we once were. Yet there's some much I don't say. Handing her her leaving present and seeing her so at ease after work made me realise how much of a space would be left (no puns intended) now she won't be in the office. Gonna miss her. And the final no show for a week - my boss has gone to checkout the rain in Spain, falling softly on the plains. So I really have been staring at walls.

Except I haven't. Friday evening was a darn fine evening in the pub. Saturday was not such a fine day in the hangover department. But my recollections of the evening before were all received with a knowing glow. Finally a connection is made. Sunday catch ups. Monday night was swimming - 40 lengths and no passes (even with seemingly all the team there). Tuesday was beer fest night at the Wetherspoons. Yesterday I had an afternoon off. And now I just feel as if something/one is missing. Like something is waiting to happen.

Chicago

Took Mazza to a musical tonight... Chicago.

It was swell!

Argh. . .

Open Your Eyes..

All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you
My bones ache, my skin feels cold
And I'm getting so tired and so old

The anger swells in my guts
And I won't feel these slices and cuts
I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine

Tell me that you'll open your eyes [x4]

Get up, get out, get away from these liars
'Cause they don't get your soul or your fire
Take my hand, knot your fingers through mine
And we'll walk from this dark room for the last time

Every minute from this minute now
We can do what we like anywhere
I want so much to open your eyes
'Cause I need you to look into mine

Tell me that you'll open your eyes [x8]

All this feels strange and untrue
And I won't waste a minute without you

cf Snow Patrol

This was the shot

Great promise

Friends and associates act as a catalyst for your good fortune. Monday is well-starred as the Sun aspects both Jupiter and Uranus. If you are invited out anywhere, do take up the offer. You will be given some great opportunities to advance your goals. Some of the offers you get may come out of the blue, so you need to be alert in order to take advantage of these. Expect the unexpected, and most of all, expect it to be a fabulous day. When the Sun sextiles Saturn on Tuesday, you may get a very solid proposal that will help you to make headway; it will be hard work, but you will be rewarded for doing it well. Thursday brings more opportunities when Jupiter sextiles Uranus, something that doesn't happen very often. This is one time when you will be truly inspired to take a risk. You will experience the phenomenon of an idea whose time has come. You will have that wonderful sense of knowing that whatever you embark upon, you can easily succeed at it. However, despite all these wonderful influences, don't take any risks on Thursday, especially if they involve a lot of money. After this, you are on safe ground once again.

What a day...

A new American President.

A new start for the US - let's hope a new start for us, the world.

Heard the news at 6am with Radio Five Live - am amazed and heartened.

Read the news etc on the beeb website..

Wheel Of Fortune

This week, you spin the wheel of fortune, karen, and you won't know from one day to the next what the outcome will be. You enjoy feeling safe and secure by establishing a daily routine, but you know that life doesn't always conform to plan. On Tuesday, your ruler, Saturn, opposes erratic Uranus, and you will encounter some unpredictable experiences. People you thought you could trust may not be fully reliable, and conversely, someone you didn't think you could count on will be there for you. Now that Jupiter, the planet of blessings, is in your sector of self, you know that the real key to your contentment is to take a stand in your own life. Once you make sure that you take charge of your own happiness, you will stop depending on other people to make you feel happy or fulfilled. Have your car checked out on Saturday as the Moon conjuncts Uranus in Pisces. You may have an undetected oil leak, among other issues, so consider getting a car maintenance tune-up. You don't want to turn the key in the ignition and find out that your car is on the blink, especially if you are already late for an appointment!

For the record Mister Horoscope Man - I do not have a car... so what should I do on Saturday instead?!?

Well done!

Lewis World Championship winner

spot a theme?!!

Fairby @ the beeb?

So long

David Tennant....Dr Who won't be the same without you...

The Hotspurs

Am I dreaming? It was weird enough being awake at 5am Sunday and hearing that Ramos had been sacked along with the rest of the Spurs management - but then to hear Harry Rednapp had taken over I was in some secondary universe. Spurs went out and won Sunday afternoon. Tonight in a what on paper was a North London drubbing waiting to happen they went 1 up cf Bentley it returned to form when the Arse equalised but then the game just went mental -- Arsenal going to 4-2 but in the last few minutes the Spurs managed to claw a draw! Mental. Mental. Funny old game - but how marvellous for Happy Harry and his Hotspurs...(oh and my dad and brother!!)

Where did the extra hour go?!

Yoh! readers - amid news reports that Blogging is no longer the thing to do I come to you with a quick whizz around the passed few days. Fair to say been rather non stop and so posting has ground to a halt...

When did I last write anything... oh dear - a week ago.

So Monday - went swimming perhaps the only reason I dragged my sorry ass into work. It also prompted me to consider my week and book Wednesday off.

Nose clamp and goggles ahoy I swam my 32 lengths and then ventured once more out into the rainy Monday night. There were only 3 of us in the pool on Monday and I got promoted to the middle lane. Which was fine until I realised I was veering off towards the lane markers! Oops. But this was a minor problem compared to the horror of getting showered and down to skin only to pull out my lovely pink towel and discover it was not my bath towel but my lovely pink hand towel... thankfully the changing rooms were empty so I could rub dry without too many snigger's! Lesson learnt #2 when swimming. Pack correct towel. Lesson learnt #1 - don't get into pool chewing gum!! Learnt that way back in August!

Tuesday - ah Tuesday night football night. I love evening games. The atmosphere is always different - more vocal. And this trip I took Sparky with me with the added result being guests of Season Ticket holders get in for a tenner. Should really provide a separate match report - erm okay will do that shortly.

Wednesday - found myself on the 6.26am train from Rochester to deeper Kent. A day with the folks. Long overdue and very needed. Got home at 6.55am and after a quick cuppa and a change into walking gear Mum and I went for our country lane yomp. Very bracing and beautiful at this time of year and at that time of the morning. The leaves all on the turn. Charmed. Returned home for breakfast, banter with Pater as I roused him and encouraged him to get out of bed! We then all piled into the car to go to Broadstairs. Not somewhere I have been before - but brilliant for both me and Pa to experiment with our various digital cameras - the results of which I will post up somewhere soon. Suffice to say I love my new camera and I love Broadstairs. If I could work from home 2 days a week I would up sticks and move to the coast, as it was so peaceful and picturesque. We stopped at Manston on the way down to see what if any aircraft where in the vicinity. It was quiet - but bought back good memories of air shows past. In the evening we ventured to Marino's for pukka Fish n Chips. And I once more got a SE train and headed back to London.

Thursday. Work. Work. Walk after work and I think Sainsos. Then again can't remember.

Friday. Work. Lunch and purchase of a Network Railcard (20 quid well spent I fear!). After work drink with friend - bottle of Malbec - which was very lush, followed by a yomp to Covent Garden to the Transport Museum - got a bee in my bonnet about a proper Oyster card holder. So made my purchase and then wandered to Waterloo. I had my camera so made the most of the evening lights. Back to CW - pub to rescue Sparky.

Saturday. Up with a lark to walk and sort. Train to Gills cost me a mere 6 quid when before a Network Card it cost £10.10. Another game of footie. Home straight after. Delayed trains. Another pub rescue mission. Followed by curry and TV. At last a cosy night in.

Sunday. Early waking to get people off to work. The clocks back so felt odd and the crazy news that Harry Rednapp was new manager at Spurs.. Mental!! When rain had eased sufficiently walk whilst listening to The Archers via Homebase to buy some energy efficient light bulbs for those lights which are not part of a dimmer switch situation (tip off Homebase selling a vast majority of their bulbs for 99p!) Then home. The rain now really set in and despite energy efficient bulbs the flat felt dark and dingy...after lunch I gave up and went for a snooze whilst listening to footie. Aah.

Strictly results show followed by 'Little Dorrit' and the then BBC2 programme about 7WTC. Then bed.

And as if by magic its Monday again and my ass is seated here having been dragged for work - been to WW (10st 12) and later - swimming! Hooray.

Don't you just love time.

Know Your Friends

Your network of friends and acquaintances is going to have a powerful influence on your life this week, karen. The Sun and Mars in Scorpio indicate that they will be either firmly behind you or trying to manipulate you to take another course of action. There seem to be no half measures. Trying to work out whether your friend has a hidden agenda may be a necessity. A New Moon in the same zone heralds a time of new beginnings. This is a good moment to join clubs or groups that attract you or to move in new circles. It is also a good time to think about your long-term dreams and goals and whether you truly aiming for what you want. If not, think about making changes. You may be doing a lot of organizing behind the scenes in order to get events up and running. Your input will be invaluable at this time. Your love life is fairly quiet right now, but your social life makes up for this in big measure. If you are single, you have plenty of opportunity to get out and meet the right person. Friday is one such time when a meeting out of the blue will have tremendous chemistry. You may find yourself very attracted to the way this person thinks. It will be quite a unique experience.

Film

In traf sq

Paul Merton

Comes out of the curtains!

DIY

Still standing!

Portnoy's Complaint.

Philip Roth (only one 'l'). Have started reading it now.

I guess the biggest clue was the by-line on the cover... 'The most outrageously funny book about sex yet written'...

He is on the couch sharing his life experiences with his psychiatrist. A monologue. A monologue that has shades of other American novels I have read in it...think I may enjoy this one!!

Swimming

32 lengths later - the shoulders and neck still ache and I think my arms are going to drop off!! Oops. The moral of the story - DIY should be left on the shelf - go out and take piccies instead - far less strain!! Hey ho - footie tomorrow night!! UTG!

Hopes And Wishes

Listen up this week, karen, because if you don't, you will miss out on learning some relevant information regarding your life situation. Yes, you are shrewd, clever, and astute, but that doesn't mean you don't need a little cosmic help and guidance along the way. On Monday, the Moon in perceptive and intuitive Cancer trines Uranus in your sector of your mind and imagination, and you come across a piece of information that will set your brain buzzing. Once that happens, you will flash onto the right solution to your current dilemma. Remember that guidance comes in all shapes and sizes, and you can read a passage in a book or overhear a conversation and presto - you have the information you are seeking. On Wednesday, the illuminating Sun enters your sector of hopes and wishes, and you realize that you have changed quite a bit since you first wished on a star long ago and your personal circumstances have altered. You need to refine your goal list so that it fits the person you are today, not the person you were last year or several years ago. Make a new wish list for yourself, one that suits your desires more than your outdated list does.

Who are..

still like a cocktail stick?

yup, Spurs still only have 2 points.

oh dear.

DIY

I would like to add that today has been made quite poor by the self inflicted DIY mission I went on yesterday and the subsequent damage I have heaped on myself as a result.

All plans to go walking and snapping went out the window when I realised my books were piling up in front of my full bookcase. There was only one answer - by a new additional bookshelf. So I checked the Argos offering and decided on a mid size cabinet purporting to be walnut in colour so it would match my tall book shelf. For once Argos as an experience was bearable - in and out in under 10 mins - on a Sunday!! However I had underestimated the weight of said parcel. Funny how a female carrying a large box which is obviously heavy elicits only one reaction - do nothing. No-one steps aside or offers to help but just stares instead. Very irritating. So I get box home. Arms both now 2ins longer. I can see my hands wobbling as the muscles in my arms twang back into place. The shakes. I then proceed to clear floor and get building. Walnut. Mm. Its browner than my other shelves. Not a match in any way. Oh well.

The actual construction was relatively easy and all in all a very satisfying experience. Banging in 20 nails loudly was enjoyable on so many levels - mainly knowing all my neighbours were in.

Cabinet complete my next task was to sort books and move furniture etc to fit it all in. I began this whole jaunt at noon. I finally put the last of the rubbish under the stairs at 6pm. My camera walk right out the window. Stuff to go to charity sky high. A rare occasion I wish I had a car.

At 6.20pm I went out for my 4 mile stomp but I could feel all those muscles I hadn't used in years starting to yell at me. Across my shoulders, my knees are sore from clambering round floor with piles of books and my forearms are fighting back the bruises I know are going to come from carrying the box home in odd way.

At least it achieved one thing - there are no books in front of my shelves just a wine rack with several tempting bottles of red and if anyone wants a Stephen King book I have 10 spare you can have...free. I also discovered several other books I no longer want and a whole speaker system that again if anyone is interested in - its yours.

As for my camera it was snug in its carrier longing for me to finish up. Hey ho. Soon Lumix, soon.

Good drive

Next stop Brazil ...

Distracted

This week has been really odd. It has felt like only half of me has really been taking part and the weirdest part is not really knowing where the other half has been. Work wise there has been a sort of stasis pending an important meeting Friday am.

Socially I have been doing the things I enjoy - walking, snapping pix and drinking with chums.

Personally. I have been struggling once again with relationships. The who. The why. The when. Perhaps only half me has been present because I am not really talking about these other influences. But then I tend to not talk too much about me stuff. Bottle it up and throw it in the sea. Maybe someone will get the bottle and manage to read the message inside.

Every once in a while there is a plateau whereby decisions don't need to be actively made - they just are. Then are occasions when you fight to avoid making a decision as you fear the result or you suspect the choice you make will be the one that sets off a whole new chain of events. Then there are the decisions which you actively seek out. Purchases. Hair colours. The less likely to harm your life choices. Then there are the resolves you make but which depend on another to become more than just a resolve.

Currently I am dimly aware that on the horizon I am going to have to decide whether to stay here or depart to other shores. I have to decide how much a value the my current plateau. This is not easy when the mountain peaks around me offer a similar plateau if I am prepared for the upheaval of turning down from this one and ascending a fresh one. I could remain as is. Yet external situations make this unlikely.

To the unknowing these are riddles. The colour lies within the story.

If I had a family member dying a painful death on the other side of the world I would be torn. The stakes are high. A job and its pay, which are already a strain with 12 hour shifts and that have incurred a destination move to a place and a room that are not really my home. A job which I have no control over or any idea when it will cease. The illness on the other side. The pain you know is being suffered. The conversations which mask it. The chats to fellow siblings. The not really knowing - either here or there.

The person who you are closest too here not really at hand and therefore you see in passing so easy to take for granted. The situation you leave behind. The mutual understanding you think you leave behind.
The situation you enter at the other side.

What choice do you make?
This is not my story but that of someone close. It's breaking their heart and driving them deeper into their comforting scene... making them less able to make rational decisions. Making them less easy to reach.

There's another story going on around me which until recently had not been updated. It was a needed venture to hear the next chapter. To understand the behaviour that couldn't be detailed until the moment of explanation.

I am distracted and I am torn.

They are distracted and torn.

Saturday

Today is the first Saturday I have been at home (and up right) all day for AGES!! Well over a month in fact, which is perhaps why I have had a feeling of contentment all day.

I slept soundly - despite several interruptions and turning in very late and the nagging wish to listen to the Grand Prix qualifications when I first woke up at 5.30am. When it was dark. The heating had only just come on. The comforting nose of the warming water flowing through the pipes - the sound of warmth. I snoozed again. Until my alarm went off at 6.10am. The heating drawing to a crescendo before it goes off. The light still trying to sneak in through the cracks between the curtains and the walls. I fall deeply this time - all hopes of China qualification listening out of the window until the doorbell goes. I was expecting it. The postman. It is now 8.10am.

Yes - with curled hair and no sight aids I lurch to the door. Oops a dressing gown might be a better bet. The postie is armed with my parcel and wearing shorts. The sun is out, but the morning spell is starting to lose its hold. I am glad the parcel has come so early - but not early enough for me to go for my walk pre 8am, as I prefer at the weekends so as to avoid too many people/cars but also because the light is different is magical and the smells as the air starts to warm in the sunlight. Mm my favourite time of day. Then again I was dead to the world. Dreaming of my neighbours and landlord (not so much a dream as a glimpse as to how much worse it could be).

It's my new camera and I am very excited. But in a typical fashion I place all thoughts of getting up and going out with it until I have sorted all the other stuff that 6 weeks of no real time in the flat has left me to deal with. So I dig out the battery and the charger. Charge battery - do stuff n nonsense - camera play later.

Dress rapidly - put washing machine on and the leave the house.

The other thing I have failed to do for ages is actually cook myself a proper meal - soup and rolls with cream cheese and pate do not count. So I grab my shopping bag and plan a meal for one for my preparation and later consumption.

I eventually leave the house at 9ish. The traffic is already building. It's a bright Saturday so people are up and about. The roads to Wimbledon are hazardous with pedestrians and push chairs. Its not really helped by my mind being so totally distracted. But that's for another entry.

The short route along Queens Road - a road I haven't walked up or down for months. Sainsburys. Where I get what I need quickly but then seem invisible in all till queues and end up somehow being overtaken by a pensioner. Hey ho.

Home. Hang out washing. Listen to fighting talk. Prepare for clean busting. I sort out my Everest mountain of Observer papers, the recycling items and generally put stuff away - where it belongs. Th ehhover even makes along awaited appearance in all rooms! The sun streams through the windows and the flowers I have bought brighten my mood. As of now I don't have to leave the house, be social with anyone or doing anything except please myself - and it feels lush.

I cook up my delicious vegetarian lasagna and prep the cooking apple I bought back from Exeter for some cous-cous and fruit stuffing before it is baked. These chores done I turn to myself and dye my hair, and go through all the 'beauty' regimes us girls must do. Pluck, remove toe nail polish, epilate. Etc. Etc. It makes me feel more lively. Now I can settle down for five live football and look forward to an evening of eating nice proper food, having a glass of red wine and dipping in and out of Saturday pm TV.

Bliss.

Days like today just don't happen often enough.

Tomorrow - me up to watch Grand Prix then out to explore the city with new camera!

Bradford 2 v Gillingham 2

Which though just a draw is actually something of a result.
We were 2-0 down and looking like another 3 goal defeat by half time. But no the plucky lads fought back to even the result, maintain our goal difference and prove we can pull ourselves together after a bad start.

I wasn't there but I was whooping in the lounge at each goal flash on Radio Five.

Go the Gills!

The team lined up as follows:
Royce, Fuller, King, Mills, Nutter, Southall, Bentley, Weston, Barcham, Mulligan (McCammon 74), Jackson (Richards 86).
Subs Not Used: Lewis, Julian, Jarrett.

Sent Off: Bentley (58). (Oops)
Booked: Fuller.
Goals: Jackson 51, 84

Got a double dose this week - home Tues and next Saturday - so 6 points please lads!!

----

Additionally - good to see the Bradford manager complaining!! (To think I used to think he was a sort!!)

Capricorn - Day Ahead

Maybe your energy level is not very high, so basically you can't be bothered doing very much. You just want to put your feet up in a chair and daydream your way through the day. If you can manage it without upsetting your schedule, well, why not? The Full Moon falling at the lowest point of your chart is not gloomy, but it is a warning that you need to draw back slightly from too much work and ambition to consider your feelings more.

Week Ahead
With Venus in the secret area of your chart this week you are feeling more sensitive in your romantic life, yearning for a beautiful, spiritual connection. Just watch you aren't being too sentimental. You'll be inclined to retreat into your own dream world at the slightest hint of rejection. Your busy schedule won't allow you to play truant for long, but you must take a break along the way otherwise you will get stressed.

Dip

I have started the day full of loathing. Not even sure its self loathing.

Disappointed and hurt by several events this weekend. Actually 3 events this weekend - so that's Fri/Sat and Sun pm. Makes me feel meaningless.

And now feeling underwhelmed at my desk.

Hey ho.

Must cash in my audible credit too today before I lose it.

Oh and nose clamps make swimming more fun!! Well struggling for breath and forgetting that to use your mouth the aim is not to swallow a whole pool do test your mettle! Oh well got me 30 lengths in and am making a friend. Life under water feels so much different!

In Demand

Mars and Venus in your social zone mean that you will be far more in demand than usual. You may be busy organizing events or getting people together for meetings or for fun and enjoyment. Meanwhile, a Full Moon in your home zone on Tuesday may bring issues to a head, creating a very emotional atmosphere. Try not to get involved, but instead stay detached, and this will allow you to see the whole thing in perspective. Don't make any rash decisions, but bide your time until you are certain of what to do next. Tuesday is not the best day for closing deals that involve a lot of money or asking for that pay raise. You have better luck if you wait until the end of the week. Meanwhile, Mercury turns direct on Wednesday in your career zone, which will make life a lot easier. If you've experienced delays and frustration, this should come to an end fairly soon. From this point on, doing business will be a lot more rewarding than it has been. From Saturday, you may find that you don't have as much control of your business affairs as usual. Events triggered by those in key positions may cause you to change direction or rethink your decisions.

Today

... not the day for Lewis to stamp his sterring wheel on the WDC. Pity, some of us were up to see it (well most of it - and not the beginning - I over slept. So its my fault!).

October

... the new summer?

US

We are all aware of the upcoming American elections. You know pit bulls with lipstick. A Palin that isn't Michael. An Obama that has no relationship to Osama. A McCain that isn't an oven cooked chip. And Obama's right hand man who barely seems to be getting a mention....here at least. My feelings for the US vary. Ask me about the landscape of the states I have visited and I will talk enthusiastically. Ask me about invasions and I will berate. So the current flurry of US themed programmes poses treats and tricks in equal measure.

I end my weekend with Stephen Fry in America. Why o why does the BBC keep doing this? They tried it with Victoria Wood in India and it was cringe worthy. These programmes only graze a surface and leave me feeling short changed. I want more detail - I want a unique view. Not a contrived celebrity view. 'It's typically American'. Fine Stephen but when are you going to explain WHAT that actually means? He went to several states and got to see some views and sights that not everyone will. But it was brief. His trip through New York - ah let's pick up Sting so we can play his song. I was disappointed. The old dear in the gambling hall who claimed he had a great personality did make me chuckle. Yes indeed he has. In Blackadder maybe. This was an hour in poor contrast to the more challenging and consequently BBC 2 programme I started my weekend with. The American Future: A History, by Simon Schama was by far, a more considered hour. It had personal significance as it dealt with issues I had first been made aware of way back in 2000 when I spent 3 months in the American West.

Water. Marc Reisner's Cadillac Desert. The taming of the Colorado which has had some benefits and also caused some major problems. It did not dumb down the content. And yes the camera work did the scenery justice. You go to America you see that everything is on a huge scale. Both programmes captured that. But I didn't really learn much from Stephen. (It was too much about him) Expect how to put a lobster to sleep. But Simon helped put my earlier knowledge into a more current perspective. I am not so sure about Mr Schama (too many Deadringers memories) but he did at least get under the skin of the issues.

I am about to return to Phillip Roth's novel and get his view on the place.

Oddly a year ago I was finishing Updike's Rabbit Series.

An autumnal cycle is in flow.

Sunday Sunshine

It's all too good! SO my catch up will continue later - now though - time for a walk!!

Gillingham 5 - Morecambe 0

I only sing when we win? Maybe.

Okay so its 5 goals at home and it brings our goal difference back to -1 which is a better place to be. Not sure why the difference in performance. Southall's return, home crowd, sunshine and maybe the fact that the Morecambe side showed shades of being a pub team. Or maybe it was because Arfur had bought his grand daughter - a new lucky charm. Or my new haircut or boots. Who knows. But I couldn't get excited until number 3 went in! Then it was a total reversal of the game I watched last Saturday.

And so it was there in the sun we won 5 and set the bar for the later England game. 5-1 huh.

Anyway Stimson went from monster to hero in 90 minutes. Funny old game. Funny old league.

Gillingham lined up as follows:

Royce, Fuller, Mills, King, Nutter, Southall, Weston (Lewis 88), Bentley, Jarrett (Barcham 22), Jackson, Mulligan (McCammon 66). (Yup more squad numbers!!)

Subs Not Used: Richards, Julian.

Goals: Bentley 21, Jackson 24, 36, Artell 73 og, McCammon 80.

Exeter City 3 - Gillingham 0

(October 4th 2008) A trip to the South West served 2 purposes - firstly to catch up with Baggy and Chuffy and secondly to go to my first away fixture of the season. It was the perfect combination to get me out of London and away from work for 4.5 days. It felt good for that reason alone.
So Saturday traffic in Exeter suggests that football and shopping are quite popular. And the ground was heaving with Exeter fans - standing at both ends. The Gills had bought 407 trusty fans - I think I was probably #400. And we were all stood in a fairly small terrace behind the goal. It was football I as I remember it. Exposed to the elements and at the edge of the action. (I do though wonder at the philosophy of putting the family section (seated) next to the away fans small seated section)

Come the 43rd minute and the third Exeter goal I had convinced myself a pasty was in order...the second half was more even and no more goals were scored. I enjoyed it just for the thrill of standing on the touch line practically and leaning on the rails whilst corners were taken right in front of me.




The fans were less enthused. Mr Stimson not a popular chap by 4.45pm.

Mornin mist

Good choppy bob

At back too

Fab sunset this pm

Choppy bob

Need I say more?!

Spot the beebs

Over used finance graphic!