Weekend

And here we are again. Boy has the weather been naff this weekend. Grey. Cold and drizzle. What happened to those warming days of April?

Yesterday was a day of 2 halves (minor pun intended).

I got up early-ish in order to duel with London Transport and meet my friend Baggy who was up from Exeter (which again in a cruel twist in this missive) at Paddington Station at 11.20. Whilst waiting a Gills fan clad in shirt and scarf walked by - I shouted Good luck and explained my lack of ticket plight. He was enthused that we had sold our away end allocation and sprinted off with purpose. Part of me felt jealous - another part relieved that with the rain and chill wind it would be a different end of season experience for me.

I then found Gill and she & I wandered around the Paddington Basin and found Edgware Road station and headed back into town for a stroll and some fodder. She took photos on the tube of Kenton - the namesake of where she now lives - which coincidentally is also on the Bakerloo line. We got to Embankment and headed to the South Bank. Some wanton Elephant Parade pix and then some lush Waggamamas. It being a Saturday it was full of families and my bag narrowly avoided low flying noodles being misplaced by a toddler in the seat next to me! No low flying beans on this trip. Afterwards we headed along the river to Westminster Bridge - for some reason it was very popular place to be. Across the Bridge avoiding the tourists taking photos of our great as yet unfilled Parliament buildings we headed back along to Embankment and sniggered at various odd coach names parked along the road. We headed up to Trafalgar Square - protesters angling for free votes and a system that worked. Then onward up Charing Cross Road - to Tottenham Court Road and the demise of the Astoria. Another building site and empty void where once something of great history stood. On up towards Goodge Street and Paper Chase for a Nero's coffee and continued chat. It's moments like these that I miss. My good friends are all asunder across the country and just sitting and exchanging stories and absorbing a trusted friends insight face to face is precious. All the time I wondered if my lack of things to say was a reality across the board and not just with virtual strangers but also with friends of 15 years plus. And if it the case then it is perhaps down to me to have more things in my life to talk about. We had some laughs and also meandered through varying family crisis's and at 3.20pm we said our goodbyes on the Northern Line. Baggy headed for Colindale and I back to Waterloo. Though I got out earlier so I could listen to the radio and pick up the latest football scores.

Once at Waterloo I got on a train. At this point we were drawing 0-0. Tranmere were winning and Exeter were losing. As my journey continued Exeter equalised and we conceded. It was not going to be a stress free afternoon. Once at Wimbledon I walked back towards home. A friend rang from the pub offering company. I could not sit still so kept walking until safely home. By this time Gills has conceded two more goals, Tranmere were 2 up and Exeter were still drawing. we were safe. Then as I settled down with a cuppa and final score the worst happened, Exeter went ahead with minutes to go. Huddersfield needed to score again but it was not to be. So based on our poor goal difference and lack of points Gillingham were relegated.

I rang home. Dad and I rued our season of missed opportunities and wasted games. He was in a tizz because the ash cloud was threatening his departure for the States Sunday morning. I chatted with Mum and we said our goodbyes.

Then another call from the pub - my friend from Zim, lets call her Cherry, wanted to know if I was coming out for a drink. I decided it was better than sitting and mulling over relegation and other things so toddled up to the pub. Drinks - Twenty-20 cricket and some disco dancing. Not too bad from my point of view but all around friends and couples I know where slowly getting more drunk and more self destructive. Everywhere there are people mis-communicating and hurting other people. Just before midnight I said my good byes and sauntered home. Bed.

Bed. Bed. I did not want to get up this morning. It was still grey and the reality of the last few weeks keeps hitting me hard when I wake. Add to that football woes - which somehow seem less of a concern right now - and sleep is a refuge.

I did get up to make tea and toast and listen to The Archers. Well sort of - think I kept dozing so need to listen to the podcast in the week. I also got a text from Mum. Dad's flight cancelled so he has re-arrnged flight for tomorrow. No doubt that has him more uptight. Then for Desert Island Discs I had a shower and cleaned bathroom. It was Fay Weldon and I was struck by her views and ideas - I could relate to some of them and it got me thinking about the writing course I have seen. I must sort that out once pay day hits. Changed sheets and generally re-organised the bed and bath rooms.

At 12.30 I got ready for the Grand Prix. Large soya milk coffee and cosy jumper. A call from Cherry checking I was ok - but I rather feel it is her that is suffering most at the minute.

The Grand Prix was quite a good race - but Lewis Hamilton must be seething to have gone out at the second to last lap due to a puncture. Once it was over I put on a few more layers and headed out for food. I got it into my head I wanted a curry! So I pootled to Sainsburys and purchased a meal for one. Nice.

Home - food - whilst listening to the end of the Premiership season. So Chelsea are winners. Who cares? They have enough cash as it is..

My NCFC friend Ziggy texted to check my footballing mood. It was very sweet of him and when I said thanks for thinking of me - he replied that it was because of my kind words to him this time last season when his team got relegated. That made me smile inwardly - I'm not a bad person after all. Funny how football can be my biggest enemy and yet also my greatest friend.

Just caught up with Casualty. More trauma and heartache. And now I am waiting for Doctor Who on Beeb 3.

And there as they say goes another weekend. It's still in my head you know. Wondering. Questioning. No matter how busy I am its just always in the periphery. Grr. Damn my head. Damn my heart.

Well the week ahead promises some respite. Off to see Camilla on Tuesday and then Mum is visiting for a few days - to look after me and beat some sanity into me - I hope I let her.