I learnt

something today.. I am who I am.. with a past the way it is... with a future yet to be determined..I know I have always been upfront about the things I care about.. listen and you will hear it...

I have a great set of friends who guide me when I am down and who let me be excited when I am... (and lets face it I don't need much) and I want to thank then once more for putting up with me...

SO far this year I have to deal with some crushing experiences.. people I trusted letting me down so badly and people who saw me as one thing realising that I was not.. It has not been easy. But I have finally realised who I could be... I am a stone lighter.. I have a bounce that I thought I had lost... I can and I will make this blessed life work for me. It is too short by far and I am not known for quitting. Despite all my best efforts!

I can only be me.. If you are in my life you get 100% and I will always go the extra mile or so for you. I am loyal in the extreme and would do anything for those I care about...

But the truth is I too have needs... I wanna be looked after and loved. I want to share the sun and the delights of life with someone who sees things as I do...

So this week I re-entered roller coaster land.. my date on Sunday was great. The long lingering and very sensual kiss goodbye making me think I had found happiness. It's all relative and what maybe in my head can be very different from what is in anothers head. I can only give what I have at any given time. Gotta speculate to accumulate...

And so to the weekend! Come on the Gills!
Looking very much forward to catching up with Jonny G and reminding myself of the year I discovered all I could be.. amusing, caring and trusted...

As for other news. My Dad has to go to hospital for tests. Diabetes is the likely cause.. but I know it will hit him hard.

Sorry to those of you who have coming seeking my blog and found it to be closed... I am back and I am me.. warts and all!

I have weird notions... I should probably be more selfish - but its not the way I am cut..

And so my blogger friends... join me in yet more exciting stories and tribulations!